TRIGGER WARNING: This page contains references to kidnapping/trafficking which may trigger readers.
At times, I may share brief snapshots of my history. It is possibly time…
This particular snapshot was taken years ago and may shock those who know me. I kept this one tucked away in the back of my lockbox, at the bottom of the pile, where no one could get to.
It’s truly hard to know what people have gone through…
It was years ago when this happened. A different time. A segment I tried to erase from memory that surfaced during difficult chapters. A segment that in hindsight seemed like someone else’s story…
***
…it was daylight…
…something wasn’t right…
…I felt weak and faint…
…I couldn’t keep my head up and my eyes were closing…
…I didn’t know it at the time, but he had drugged me…
***
…I was being trafficked, being kidnapped…
***
On route to the destination, I kept waking. Luckily, I didn’t drink all of what he gave me. In the fog of my waking moments, I screamed loudly. We weren’t on the highway just yet. There were other vehicles driving around us. His windows weren’t tinted. And I was making a scene…
***
…He eventually let me out…
***
It seemed like hours that I was stuck to the ground. I couldn’t move as I went in and out of consciousness. Stranger(s) came to help. I do not remember much, if any, of the discussion exchange. They must have brought me to safety because when I woke up, I was at a friend’s home.
I had a bad headache that lingered for days. I could only remember things in bits and pieces. I had no clue how I got there.
After I recovered, I didn’t go to the police. It was a time when police were not well-equipped to help us Jane Does and at times society treated survivors badly.
The people who wanted me, tried repeatedly to find me. They were calling and calling and calling. I told others to tell them I was gone.
This chapter in my life was a dark night of my soul. At the time, I was young, uneducated, broken and brown, but with gifts that still needed sharpening. In hindsight, had I not woken up in the vehicle, I likely would not be writing this today.
This snapshot is just the tip of the iceberg, but maybe all I’ll ever share.
Back then, I had no idea I would become a lawyer. I also didn’t know that the sun comes up in the morning.
I now stand on a precipice equipped with knowledge of the law and with grace. I am older, wiser, unashamed of my history and with nothing to prove. It took a long time to arrive.
Now I help other survivors, like me. Don’t be fooled, they come in all packages, ages and genders.
If my snapshot relates to you in any way, know that in the dark night of your soul, the sun comes up in the morning. Destiny has a plan for you. Through small steps, you will get there. I believe in you, just as others believed in me.
[I had no intentions of sharing this snapshot or any others. I lived a long time misunderstood and I was content with that. Recently, I changed my mind. This may be the last snapshot I share. Time will tell. This was difficult to write, but recently, I had a hearing. I recognized the expression on my client’s face as they described their experience. Looking at them, I saw a version of me in the aftermath of this snapshot. I was looking into a mirror back in time. Having come through it now, I want to give hope to those who feel hopeless. It’s always darkest before the dawn.]